dream on

i feel like my post on mraz concert didn't really do the justice. i was basically out of words describing how good he was. in fact, all five of us that went that night are probably all out of words, but jim managed to spit out much more than i did, as always.

so i lied again about making an entry on kaku yesterday. but i will later. just you wait.

this might seem to be out of nowhere, but i'd like to write a little about this.

step out of the reality circle. for once.

this is the real world, and no matter how you define what reality is, it's still reality. and it bites. so i say, for once, step out of reality and back into the dreamworld. remember that small world of yours where you're the main character and everything behaves exactly how you want it to be? it's not realistic, it'll never be, but go visit that world every once in a while.

do you believe in the power of dreams?

i forgot who, but i think it's probably einstein who said "reality is for people who lack imagination." it's true that everything happens in the real world and not in your dreams, but your dream and everyone else's dream can change reality. i've got no examples to support that, but look up online, i'm sure there are cases where people have been successful because they go chase their dreams.

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you looked up to the blue sky and said to your parents, "i want to be able to fly."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you looked up to the starry night sky and said to your parents, "i want to land on that star, over there."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you saw a police car passing by and said to your parents, "i want to be a cop."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you read a superman comic book and said to your parents, "i want to be a superhero and save the world from evil."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you passed by the white house and said to your parents, "i want to be the president of the united states."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you watched tv and said to your parents, "i want to be a movie star."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you went on a drive with your dad for the very first time and said to your him, "i want to drive the fastest car."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you firetruck passed by and said to your parents, "i want to be a fireman. i'm not afraid of fire."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you went to a baseball game for the very first time and said to your parents, "i want to be a pitcher who throws the fastest."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you went to a basketball game for the very first time and said to your parents, "i want to be the world's number one basketball player."

close your eyes and think about that time when you were little and you looked up to your parents and told them, "mom, dad, i want to be just like you."

you look at the above lines and say to yourself: "awww, that's cute. but that's a child's dream. that's not how the reality works." true, but isn't it sad that all of us has forgotten what we dreamt when we were little? isn't it sad that reality has taken over us and make us forget that we, once, had a beautiful dream? that we, once, had our own little world, with our imaginary friends? isn't it sad that now we look back at our childhood years and think to ourselves "i want to be able to fly? what was i thinking?" or "i want to be a president? how absurd."

there is nothing wrong about being a dreamer. i was a big dreamer when i was little. i wanted to be able to fly. i wanted to be able to master kung fu. i wanted to have my own lightsaber. i wanted to be the smartest kid in the school. i wanted to have a big house. i wanted to be able to do things that other people can't. i was a big dreamer, and i still am. only that some of my dreams have changed. i think reality came into play and changed my dreams a little, but i still dream. i want to have a high performance computer that never lags, with a seven speaker stereo system, a wireless mouse and keyboard that don't use batteries, a 32 inch LCD monitor, complete with a laser printer, fax machine, copier, and a super-fast scanner. i want to have a 40GB iPod mini. i still want my own lightsaber, a double bladed one this time. now i also want to join the jedi order. i want to have a hachiroku. i want to have my own plane so i can fly to my girlfriend anytime i want to. i want to be able to travel around the world. i want to be able to fight like jackie chan. i want to win a nobel prize in physics. my dreams are now different, but they are just as crazy as they were back then. i am a dreamer, and i take pride in that.

i myself were reminded last night about something that i used to do since i was in grade school. then i realized that i haven't done it ever since i moved here to the states three and a half years ago. before i go to sleep every night, i always put on some music and let my mind wander off to my own little world. then for the next half an hour or so, i close my eyes and start making a movie in my mind where i'm the main character. i try as hard as possible to synchronize the storyline with the music playing. strong, violent music means fighting, or struggling scenes; cheerful music means fun, romantic scenes; sad, gloomy music means death scenes. i'm not suicidal or anything, but i like to end my imaginary world with my character's death. i just thought that death of the main character in the end of a movie as the easiest way to signify his character without much character development. if it's not death, then some parting. two lovers separated; two best friends separated; two brothers separated. this i have not done since three and a half years ago. the songs from GARNET CROW brought this idea to mind. i was craving for no apparent reason to listen to their songs, so i took out my mp3 player and put on my earphone while lying on the bed in the dark. then i recalled this little habit of mine and how long it has been since i last did it. i closed my eyes and tried to see if i can still pull it off. it took a while to get the juice going, but it started. i went through flying, kimi to iu hikari, last love song, and kyou no kimi to ashita wo matsu with a solid storyline that ends up in separation. it's great to be able to imagine. to dream.

having a dream is like having something you'll never lose. it might never come true, but at least you have the hopes of it coming true. at least you have something to keep yourself going. at least you know, at the very last resort, that you can dream. people who dwell too much in reality tend to forget that they can dream. that they, once, dreamt as well. and as a result, whenever reality bites them hard in the ass, they're completely torn apart. they have nothing else to keep going. they have no dreams to keep them going, and ironically, they have forgotten how to dream.

religion is something where faith comes in, and to some people religion acts solely as a last resort. something like, if you've lost everything else, you still have god that you can persevere under. dream is like that. if you are a non-religious person who do not believe in god, you can believe in your dream. you can make your dream the last resort, the last thing to keep you going, to remind some of you suicidal people that death is not a solution. dreams make life beautiful. it's not reality, but dreams can help you get through even the hardest obstacle in reality. death, on the other hand, just allows you to jump right out of reality and never comes back, thus abandoning that one obstacle that makes you give in to death. you escape, but you lose. if you have no god to persevere under, persevere in your dreams. life is a journey; you will encounter obstacles along the way, and some are just probably too hard for you to overcome, but life is just too good to give up on. if you've lost trust on your friends, family, yourself, or even god, try dreaming. maybe it could help.

just don't forget how to dream.