Sunday, April 30, 2006

Friday, April 28, 2006

eyeshield 21

my favorite scene in the first 14 volumes

hiruma is the fucking devil.

players only love you when they're playing

my coffee hasn't tasted very good lately. i wonder why. i'm not anywhere close to being superstitious, but when my coffee doesn't taste good, usually it's because there is a problem or a dilemma that's bothering me, without me realizing it. after all, a good coffee is one which beans were ground with love, which water was boiled with love, which sugar was poured in with love, and which creamer was bought with love. without love in the process of making, coffee won't taste like coffee; it will taste like something else that is not coffee. then the process of pouring in the boiling water has to also be done with love, as well as the stirring, which has to possess a smooth, flowing uniform movement around the inside of the cup. the movement cannot be erratic by the slightest bit, because it might ruin the uniformity of the sugar concentration as it's being dissolved in the coffee. this very delicate process of coffee making is quite simple and can be mastered quickly, but when done with chaotic, unstable, wavering emotions, even the greatest of coffee gurus can fail at making a coffee that tastes like coffee, even if the maker is completely oblivious of such emotions.

that, or it could just be the case of too much water and not enough coffee.

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Wednesday, April 26, 2006


some people just say really stupid things, and what makes it worse is that they sometimes don't even realize how stupid the things they just said.

i'm starting to get really tired of dealing with people.

Monday, April 24, 2006

why not?

a lot of people wonder why i never take requests. well, not never, but very rarely. if you think i don't take requests because i don't want to spend time drawing for other people, then you've mistaken principles for arrogance.

though, it's not so much principles. there was a time in my life when i would draw whatever people requested of me, but it's over, and i would never go back to that time ever again. reason is that when you draw for people, you have expectations to fulfil. if you draw them something that fulfils their expectations, you get "thanks" and an expression of gratitude, which is great. but if you draw them something less than fulfilling, they give you "thanks" and an expression of fake gratitude, and this one hurts the most. when people come and bash something you spent a few hours working, it's irritating, but when people come and show you a fake gratitude for something you've spent a few hours working, it's not irritating, it hurts. it feels like there are squinggiggillion sentences of "you're worthless! you can't even fulfil such a simple request!" hitting you at the same time.

for this reason i don't take requests. if i feel like drawing something for you, i will, but i refuse to have to live up to anyone's expectation. you should probably have felt this at some point in your life: when you're doing a task/hobby that you usually enjoy to fulfil someone else's expectation, it takes away all the fun.

so that problem's been solved, and by not taking requests i've never had to deal with any of those ever again. but a new problem came up.

i like drawing for people. so when people don't make requests, i would draw something for them just because i feel like it. this way i don't have to live up to anyone's expectation, because no one is expecting anything. but apparently that's not all there is to it. when you've labored yourself making something spectacular for someone, and then the response is mostly "oh, that's nice," no matter how sincere the response is, it is not satisfying. eggy was right; he said that there is a difference between sending hentai pictures to someone who thinks you can't do much with just two girls, and someone who screams "SEND AWAY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!"

although this is not hentai related stuff, there really is a difference between getting an "OMGLURVEIT" response and an "oh, that's nice." i can't say which one i like better since even the former response might look enthusiastic just because it's a text, but the latter sort of gets you thinking, "uh oh, does this person not like it?" and when you get the latter response, you look back at your drawing and start thinking that some things are wrong, that such line should not be there, that the idea of so and so interacting with such and such is such a stupid idea, that this part should have been made smaller, and that part should have been made bigger, and the thought just never stops. and when the thought stops, you find yourself staring at your drawing, feeling like you've just wasted a few days of your life making the biggest piece of shit ever, because even you yourself cannot seem to find anything "fun" in it. the "fun" vibes it gave out when it was still in sketching stage has disappeared, and you really have no idea where or when things started to go wrong.

i guess maybe life would be lot more peaceful if we only try to satisfy ourselves and never others. but then such a peaceful life would be lonely as well.


Sunday, April 23, 2006


so many things to do, so little time.

no wonder it's so much easier to just give up and sleep.

Friday, April 21, 2006

if you can't say anything nice, then bash thoroughly

you'd think that when people sell thongs online, they would ship it in something more subtle, but no.

no one's gonna think it's a slice of pizza. idiots.

anyway, i got your thongs. see you in july. you owe me one MORE, considering how many you've owed me in the past. i really need to keep tabs of all these owing business.

did i ever mention how i despise my fellow physics majors? not all, but most. so if you're one of my fellow physics majors reading this, then you might want to stop reading if you can't handle the truth. there is a reason i don't hang out or become close friends with a lot of them, and this is the reason why.

physics majors are condescending bastards who only care about themselves and only do things that are beneficial to them. again, not all, but most of them are like that.

it is completely and entirely understandable that human beings have egos and are obliged to feed them. don't deny it. we all do this. if you have never done this, consciously or unconsciously, chances are by now you've probably attempted many suicides because you feel worthless. human beings are negative people; they need to find something positive around them that can bring them out of the negative state so they can go on with their lives. if you stick around the negative side of the axis, you'll get sucked in even more and end up in a state of depression. unfortunately, this is also the case with the positive side; you'll get sucked in even more and end up in a state of arrogance.

how do human beings feed their ego? by looking down on people who are not as good as they are in a certain aspect of life. this is perfectly fine. it is perfectly fine to look at someone else and think "ah, i'm better than him." it is perfectly fine, UP TO A POINT. there is a fine line between feeding your ego ENOUGH to just be able to get yourself out of the negative state and feeding your ego TOO MUCH. if you don't feed your ego, ever, you will feel worthless and depressed, but feeding it too much brings about arrogance and overconfidence. it's a dangerous game to play. physics people do this thing of feeding their ego enough, but they also get other people feeding their ego as well, and this leads to too much ego-feeding.

when you find out that someone is a physics major, NEVER, EVER say "oh my god, you've got to be really smart!" it's a line that comes up every time, and is probably meant as nothing more than surface compliment, but it FEEDS THAT PERSON'S EGO. you need to stop that. if you have ever taken a physics class and you think your professor or TA is really cocky, then you've seen the result of people telling them how smart they are for ten to twenty years. please. next time you find out about someone being a physics major, instead say, "oh dear, you must be really lazy," because all physics majors are essentially lazy bastards, and they cannot ever deny that. if they try to deny this, remind them of the reason why they never write down the "0" and "infinity" whenever they have a sum from 0 to infinity.

another thing that i despise about most physics people is their attitude towards non-physics people and their unwillingness to help them. they seem to think they're able to do just about everything outside physics, because everyone thinks physics is the hardest subject. after all, if you can do the hardest subject, you can do the easier ones, right? no. if you give a pencil to a physics major, there is a very small chance that he will be able to draw you something that looks like what he attempted to draw. often you will hear a physics TA say "oh, i like teaching this section because they get the stuff really fast." what they're actually saying is "oh, i like teaching this section because they don't waste so much of my time." it is a very sad thing when you have a teacher who likes to help "people who get it fast." the "fast" people aren't the ones who need your help. it's the "slow" ones who need your help. and i find it very unacceptable to call someone "dumb" and "hopeless" just because they are slow. i find it sad that physics is essentially a field where you weed out the slow ones and keep the fast ones, and this arguably because it's easier to teach the fast ones. i find it even more sad that it is the field that i am studying.

i admit, that i am not innocent. i do feel frustrated when helping other people who just don't seem to ever gonna get it, and sometimes i even get angry, but i don't quit and call them dumb and hopeless. there's a poster up in my highschool math classroom, and it says "teachers get paid so little to teach people who are not even willing to learn because they are simply passing down the knowledge that was passed down to them."

there, i said it. there are a lot more to say, but i've ranted enough. of course, the same can be said to everyone in their respective majors and not just physics. in the end, the only conclusion that can be drawn is that the higher up you go in education, the worse your attitude towards the society becomes.

again, i make claim that this is not true for ALL physics majors. some of you have been the greatest, coolest, most supportive people i have ever met in my life, and i am very grateful for that.`

Thursday, April 20, 2006

the case of lost and not found

i think i lost my motivation and willpower sometimes at the beginning of the quarter, and now i can't seem to find it.


Monday, April 17, 2006

november 7th

few interesting things that happened to occur on the same day as my birthday:

~ 1837 - In Alton, Illinois, abolitionist printer Elijah P. Lovejoy is shot dead by a mob while attempting to protect his printing shop from being destroyed a third time.
~ 1867 - Birth of Maria Sklodowska-Curie, Polish-born chemist and physicist, recipient of the Nobel Prize in physics and in chemistry (d. 1934)
~ 1888 - Birth of Sir C. V. Raman, Indian physicist, Nobel Prize laureate (d. 1970)
~ 1927 - Birth of Hiroshi Yamauchi, Japanese computer game executive, Ex Nintendo President
~ 1960 - Death of Tommy Thayer, KISS lead guitarist
~ 1962 - Death of Eleanor Roosevelt, First Lady of the United States (b. 1884)
~ 1962 - Richard M. Nixon loses the gubernatorial election in the U.S. state of California. In his concession speech, he states that this is his "last press conference" and that "you won't have Dick Nixon to kick around any more".
~ 1963 - Birth of John Barnes, English footballer <--- that liverpool sonuva---
~ 1973 - Birth of Yunjin Kim, South Korean actress <--- hot asian chick from LOST.
~ 1978 - Birth of Rio Ferdinand, English footballer <--- that manchester united sonuva---
~ 2000 - Hillary Rodham Clinton is elected to the United States Senate, becoming the first First Lady of the United States to win public office.

two physicists and two footballing bastards were born on my birthday. how about myself as a bastard physicist?

another note to self

i find it disturbing that everytime i go to a restaurant and i see something made with blackbean sauce i would think "ooo, black bean sauce," order it, and after a few bites come to a sad realization that i do not like blackbean sauce. usually after this i would make a mental note to self to never order anything with blackbean sauce, only to find out that a week later when i go to a different restaurant and see something made with blackbean sauce i would again think "ooo, black bean sauce," order it, and hate it all over again.

today when i was making dinner, i found a jar of blackbean sauce in the kitchen, thought, "ooo, blackbean sauce," used it, and hated my dinner.

am i that stupid? this has definitely got to stop.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

our ally champion has fallen

let's just say this one's a sequel.

happy birthday, meethz

how do chickens fertilize their eggs? it can't possibly be internal fertilization since we hardly see chickens humping each other, roosters don't have a penis, and the hens lay the eggs out anyway. so it has to be external fertilization. but how? once the egg is laid, the yolk is protected with a thick shell. how do the male chicken penetrate through this thick shell? do they actually have a thin needle-like penis that becomes active at night to inject their sperm into the egg and fertilize it? that sounds outrageous. now think about it: usually after the eggs are laid, the female chicken would sit on their eggs and then the eggs would eventually hatch to become chicks, so maybe the female chickens are actually the one possessing this thin needle-like penis to fertilize their own eggs? but if that's true, then female chickens would be hermaphrodite and we would never need male chickens to be around. maybe male chickens really do hump female chickens at night when all the chicken farmers are asleep. maybe they actually have internal fertilization. maybe all this egg-laying procedure is just one big conspiracy to trick human beings into thinking that they have external fertilization. maybe the egg already has a live chick in it when it's laid, and all the female chicken has to do is warm it up by sitting on it. that's right. maybe the chickens are deceiving us. maybe they actually have hot, passionate sex when the farmers aren't watching.

and happy easter to you too.

on that subject, don't you ever wonder too why t-rexs have such short arms? what are those for? and because their arms are so short, how do they pick their noses? how do they scratch their backs? how do they masturbate? maybe the caves in the prehistoric era really did serve a purpose, but then again if this theory were to be true, they'd all be covered in dinosaur semen.

Friday, April 14, 2006

the vortex

i doodled too much today.

dear someone,

i bought you your cute undies. you better do me some favor in return.

and by favor i don't mean money.

quote of the week

this one's by david.

a girlfriend is like the one poop that, no matter how many times you flush down the toilet, just keeps coming back up.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

something that rhymes with tue

new webcomic strip is up.

avocado juice always gives me headache, but i never stop loving it since i was little. it's the kind of headache that's very satisfying. back when i was little i would scrape every last drop from the cup with a spoon, and after that i would venture my tongue all over the inside of the cup, licking every single last drop that i can reach with my tongue, to make sure i don't miss a single drop.

and then i would start getting headache, but usually when this occurred i would already be home and all set for one long nap.

i miss my childhood.

Monday, April 10, 2006

dear adobe,

your photoshop has just crashed on me again. this time i lost three hours worth of work. how about implementing some sort of auto-recovery or auto-save system?


a customer.

damn right. my next webcomic strip is gone, so it's not my fault that i'm taking a few days break. i finished a new sanji doodle, though.

foul mouth

: if i were gonna have sex i'll do it with you
: at least if you suck i can yell at you and whip your ass

oh hell, i'm taking a raincheck on that offer.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

unequivalent trade

new comic strip for monday's issue. today's webcomic is also up.

i want the azumanga beanie. maybe i'll go get it.

Friday, April 07, 2006

i always play catching up

this is probably the first time in a very very long time that i have 5-day hiatus between posts. i've been very very busy procrastinating, so please bear with me.

i have made my decision to go to irvine instead of santa cruz for graduate school, mainly because of a few points that i consider quite important to me:
1. access to good asian food places.
2. guaranteed on campus housing.
3. free parking on campus housing lots.
4. access / options to join different projects.
5. field of neutrino physics.
6. friendly faculty members.
7. department's event organization skills.

irvine managed to provide all of these, while santacruz failed quite miserably. while santacruz offers more money, i don't think i would be willing to sacrifice all of the above factors for money. besides, my life has been following the path of "turning down offers with lots of money," and so far i have never regretted my decisions. after all, one earns the bragging rights for turning down money offer.

i went up to santacruz to visit on monday, bringing my tablet and my laptop with me, and it was not until i got on the plane that i realized that what i brought with me was not my tablet, but merely a mousepad and a mouse because i left the tablet pen on my desk. so i was stuck without being able to doodle on my tablet until wednesday.

i came back wednesday noon only to find out that my baggage was sent to orange county instead of sandiego. the southwest personnel claimed that it happened because sandiego has the code SAN and orange county has the code SNA since they're in santa ana. apparently my luggage wanted to go to irvine more than i do (irvine is next to santa ana, for those who don't know).

LiFe SuCKS has been up and running since april fools now. i've been doodling on tablet a lot, so check out the DOODLES section. the WEBCOMIC also has accumulated 4 strips now. my goal is to update the webcomic section daily, if possible.

i got more tortilla bread last night, so now i can make quesadillas again. stupid sam killed my last stock of tortilla bread, so for a few days i was stuck with not being able to make quesadillas for midnight snack. i finally got over my laziness last night and bought some more.

life as a vegetarian isn't that bad. aside from the occasional drools i get when i see my friends eating sauteed fish or barbecued ribs, i don't really get sudden cravings for meat. maybe from now on i'll eat only vegetables when i'm home, and eat meat only when i go out to eat with friends. easter is coming up, so my vegetarian days are almost over.

Sunday, April 02, 2006

we named the monkey "jack"

so i haven't blogged a lot lately. in fact, i have done nothing more than posting up doodles. i'm ashamed, that i am.

but it's springbreak, so i have an excuse to be lazy. though in fact i have been more productive than ever this springbreak.

my website: LiFe SUCkS, is now up and running. i have all of my old comic strips uploaded in the PUBLISHED STRIPS section, all of my OP fanarts in the FANARTS section, and everything else i've done in the DOODLES section. there are a lot of amusing things in the DOODLES section, so make sure you check that out, especially the doodlewars i've done with eggy and chang. starting now, i will NOT be putting my drawings in this blog. they will be available in LiFe SUCkS for viewing. i will, however, provide links to them here in this blog, but i want traffic to be redirected over there. much thanks to ocean for giving me free hosting @ KEFI. no worries, o, one day i shall stop leeching off your kindness and get my own hosting.

to those of you who read this blog, i will let you in on a little secret: i am starting a one piece doujinshi with two awesome artists: eggy and chang. how the story is gonna go i will not reveal here, but we will be working on the first and last chapter together, while anything else in between will be worked on separately. how? you will see when each respective artist puts up their part of the story (if they ever decide to do so at all). one artist will be assigned to do a few full pages, so you might see different style from one page to the next, but anything on a page will be done by one artist, with his own unique style and humor.

i happened to be assigned page 1, which i finished last night after 10 hours of work (INcluding drinking some rum, playing cards, doodling on people's faces, playing guitar and singing), so here it is, a spoiler for the 1st chapter, 1st page of our yet-to-be-titled doujin: [X]

progress report is here:
1. rough pencil sketches, three panels [X]
2. alternate version of the above. can you see a difference? [X]
3. rough pencil sketches and a little ink, four panels [X]
4. first panel, halfway inked [X]
5. complete sketch, four panels inked [X]

eggy and chang are awesome, talented artists with a great sense of humor that fits mine, but all three of us are lazy bastards, so do not expect this doujin to be finished anytime soon (if ever). however, if it ever gets finished, it will be one hilariously awesome doujin that will keep you laughing continuously; that much i dare to claim.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

happy birthday, usopp

we celebrate with google romance, instead of chang's crazy orgy.