freckles of bitterness

the bed shook, the blanket moved violently for awhile before it stopped a few seconds later. a head emerged from one end of the blanket. his eyes were wide open, staring blankly into the ceiling, which did not move even the slightest.

he turned his head and looked at his cellphone. 1.25pm. that margarita last night certainly had done him justice in giving him a good 10-hour night sleep. that, and the smirnoffs. thank you alcohol.

he hopped out of his bed and failed miserably. he tried again and failed again even more miserably. he told himself that third time had got to be a charm and tried again and this time he was successful. his eyes wandered around the room and ended up on a calendar across the room. today is the eleventh. he moved his eyes up a little bit. eleventh of novemeber. eleventh of eleventh. interesting.

the black mesh chair was facing him, as if inviting him to sit on it, so he did, since he never refused any good invitation, except for the times when he thought the events were pointless, such as party invitations. he bent down and grab a giant chocolate chip cookie from the box he put on the floor. he had bought this for times like these, times when he woke up in the morning feeling hungry and not knowing if there was anything better to do than to go back to bed.

he took a bite.

it was sweet. sweeter than he had expected. but the sweetness evaporated and all that's left was the bitterness. he leaned back on his chair and enjoyed the bitterness. it will all be over tomorrow afternoon, he thought.

he took another bite.

this time it was bitter. very bitter. so bitter he contemplated on whether or not he should swallow the damn thing. the trashcan was quite far from him and he was too lazy to walk over, but he wasn't sure either whether or not he could make a perfect spitting trajectory from his mouth into the trashcan, so he decided to give in to his laziness and swallow it. the bitterness faded away and all that's left was sweetness. he leaned back on his chair again, smiling.

he took one more bite.

now there's only a small piece left, so he put it down on the desk, on top of a black book on which was printed "INTRODUCTION TO ELECTRODYNAMICS" in large, menacing letters. it was just arial black, which was as friendly as a font could get, but even friendly letters could look ultra-menacing when they form a sentence like that. he sighed. tomorrow is the big day. it's either success or failure, there is no inbetween. he sighed again. he wondered why he's torturing himself like this.

he looked out the window. sky was gloomy. bright, yet gloomy. just the way he loved it. his mind wandered off; maybe life would be better if he had just quit everything, and spend the rest of the money he had been saving up on a trip around europe. london would be a nice place to go to. then paris. then madrid. then brussels. then amsterdam, where for dinner he could have a steak with weed on the side. or maybe a trip to japan instead. of course he would have nowhere to live and would be unable to communicate with anyone, but at least his inner pedophile and otaku would be satisfied. actually, maybe he could sleep in the crew deck of the going merii they have anchored in odaiba. everything should be fine until you got caught, right?

getting a job as an assistant mangaka in japan looked like a better option than what he was doing at the moment. of course his drawing was shit, but he could always improve. and maybe he would be happier living that kind of a life, even if he had to live in a twenty-five square-feet room. he sighed again.

he extended his left hand and grabbed the last piece of the chocolate chip cookie. as he was munching it, he hoped tomorrow things would be like the second bite instead of the first one.