a tri-lemma

i was running low on my irish creme, toffee nut, and vanilla caramel creamers, so i went to get new ones at albertson's. to my surprise, they have creme brulee, chocolate raspberry, and cinnamon vanilla creme. i spent a good fifteen minutes in front of the creamer section staring at the three different kinds of creamer, contemplating which one i should try, but then people started looking at me like i was some kind of a retard and when one of the albertson's dude poked my back telling me that they're closing in 5 minutes, i knew i had to get all three and decide later at home.

so i did. but that didn't solve the problem.

just twenty minutes ago i had problem deciding which one i should try first. the old ones are completely gone now so i have no choice but to pick one for the coffee i was making. with the water starting to boil, i was running out of time, so i talked to sam.

he suggested to flip a coin.

dumbass. there are three options. not two.

he suggested to assign two of the choices to head and one to tail.

good idea, but that wouldn't be fair to the creamer now, would it? whoever gets singled out and assigned to the tail will get eliminated first, and that would cause a major creamer riot in the kitchen. that begged the question: how do you decide on which one's going to be assigned the tail?

he suggested to flip two coins. assign one choice to 2 heads, one choice to 2 tails, and one choice to 1 head and 1 tail.

again, not fair. the outcome of the probability would be 1/4 for 2 heads, 1/4 for 2 tails, and 1/2 for 1 head 1 tail. things could get messy and sticky if we don't deal with these creamers fairly.

he suggested a die. fair enough, but i don't have one.

at this point sam was about to grab me, toss me to the nearest wall, and stab me to death, so i told him i'd figure it out myself and he could just go shower. and then the most brilliant idea came to my mind, and no, this is not to use all three of them at once.

i closed my eyes, opened the fridge, and picked one randomly. chocolate raspberry it was, and no riot ensued.

the chocolate raspberry creamer literally tastes like chocolate raspberry. which is a good thing, i guess.

on a side note, it's amazing how i am suddenly able to cook because i'm giving up meat for lent. usually anything that i cook (when i have the willpower to) would taste less decent than that one frozen corndog in the freezer, so i gave up cooking and settled for the corndogs instead. but in the past two weeks i've not been eating meat, i've been cooking and they have been quite decent. i guess it's good to know that i still have some sort of a survival skill. here's a tip on making decent food when you're not eating meat. this goes from an idiot meat eater who can't cook to all the meat-eaters out there. you vegetarians won't understand how hard it is for us meat-eaters to give up meat:

1. veggie stir-fry: go to your local grocery store, and get just about everything you can find in the vegetable section. stuff i've been using thus far is cabbage, coleslaw, carrot, tomateo, garlic, shallot, mushroom, and broccoli. and get any stir fry sauce from the sauce section (or look around and see which one has the coolest looking packaging). cut the garlic into small pieces if you have patience, or if you don't, just hulk-smash them into smitherens. cut the shallot (half of it) into small pieces and toss them and the garlic into a heated frying pan (use olive oil) and stir. count to twenty and then toss everything else in. pour in the stir-fry sauce and stir. eat with rice.

2. quesadilla: buy some small/medium-sized flour tortilla bread. put shredded cheese, coleslaw, and mushroom on one tortilla bread, then let it sit on a frying pan (no oil) under medium heat. cover it up with another tortilla bread, and then wait until the bottom one is brown-ish, and flip. the cheese should stick the top and bottom tortilla together. if it doesn't, then you need to put more cheese. do it brute force.

and those are basically what i've been living off of the past two weeks.