an ounce of stale cheese

warning: bitter entry ahead.

i hate it when because someone else did something stupid, i got into trouble. and no, it's not just some random trouble, it's a trouble that puts one thing that i value over my life at stake: friendship.

they say ignorance is bliss, and what you don't know can't hurt you. i say that's true. fucking true. now i just wished i didn't know what's going on. being in between two things and paralyzed to the point where you're unable to even decide where to move, sucks like shit. shit i tell you. fucking shit.

so tell me, what would YOU do?

they say that nature is all about balance. well, it seems to me that i've always gotten myself in a lose-lose situation, and have never even once be in a win-win situation. so much for balance.

dillema. is that even the right way to spell it? or is it dilemma? i like the latter one better so i'll use that. i've always wondered why people consider a dilemma as such a big deal. i mean, it's just not being able to decide within TWO options, so it shouldn't be as bad as say, a trilemma or a quadruplemma. hell, shit, i say to myself. if anyone knows this best, it should be myself. how many of you are able to do process of elimination on a multiple choice test to narrow down the answer from five to two within a minute? a lot i bet. now how many of you are able to pick from the two answer within five minutes? not a lot.

see, the thing about only having two options to pick from, is that ONE OF THEM has FIFTY FUCKING PERCENT chance of being correct. say you had 5 options to begin with, one of them will be correct while the other four are wrong. this means you can eliminate one easily, because you have 80% chance of eliminating a wrong one, and only a 20% chance of eliminating the right one. now think about it, after you eliminate one, you're left with FOUR and your probability of eliminating the wrong one has decreased to 75%, and the probability of eliminating the right one increased to 25%. keep doing this, and you'll eventually find yourself stuck when you have 50% probability of eliminating the wrong one, AS WELL AS THE RIGHT ONE.

so which one will you pick? what would you do?

and it's not fun when EITHER WAY you go, you're screwing YOURSELF over. i'm a a big dipshit, and i hate it.

fuck.

if anything gets fucked up, please refer back to this entry. that way you understand that i didnt mean to fuck it up. i'm in a dilemma, so forgive me if i do pick the wrong decision.