raindrops keep falling on my head

i remember that line from an old song. i think it's by bee gees, or it could be by a guy named randy something, i totally have no idea. let me google it up so i don't get put in prison for 175 years and fined couple hundred million dollars for fraud information like that one enron guy.

ok, i was wrong. it's by bj thomas. bj supposed to stand for billy-joe or something like that. not that something you're all familiar with.

manchester united squad player of 1972 also sang this song and record it. it was one of the songs in the manchester united tape i bought almost a decade ago. bobby charlton, george best, martin buchan, brian kidd, sammy mcilroy, alex stepney, denis law, pat crerand, tommy o'neill. good times, great players. these people now have become legends. farewell, lads, thank you for your relentless service to the club.

going meri is really leaving. the ship can no longer be fixed and can no longer be rebuild, so luffy would have to buy a new ship. it saddens me, it saddens everyone. 328 is out and you can see how sad luffy is when informed that going meri cannot go on. someone should make an AMV as a tribute to that small caravel that has gone through the eventful journey of the strawhat pirates. farewell, going meri. thank you for watching over the crew. the crew will no longer be the same without that head of yours, always smiling and looking forward, never looking back to things in the past; without that wooden mast of yours, pridefully holding the strawhat pirate flag; without the single cannon in the front that has successfully helped the whole crew get away from danger; without that rudder that the crew always breaks. farewell again, you will be missed.

life has seen me through lots of painful moments; rejection, dejection, alienation, failure, among many other unpleasant things, but nothing hurts more than hearing my sister screaming and yelling that she hates me. i guess life is like a video game; as you go up a higher stage, the puzzle gets harder and the boss has more hitpoints. and one punch from the boss takes away more of your hitpoints. well, i'm almost out of hitpoints and i forgot to save at the checkpoint. the problem is, i don't even get to start over if i get a game over.

seriously now, what could i have done wrong? let's recap. she came home from school today, came to me and said, let's go somewhere. i declined because i was tired, i just woke up, and i hadn't showered. she went to her room, seemingly angry, slammed the door, and slept through the whole afternoon. she woke up around 6 with an unhappy face still, then sat on the couch and watched tv. i asked her where she wants to go, and she said starbucks, so i said ok let's go. her face turned cheerful a little bit but then she said that we'll go later. i nodded and continued on playing game. a little past nine, she called me up and said she wanted to go, so i changed, grabbed my keys and wallet, and walked outside. i waited outside for about ten minutes only to find, when i walked back in, that she's still talking to her friends online. i asked her again if she wanted to go now or later, because i'd rather be reading for my philosophy class than sitting outside waiting for her. she turned the computer off, changed, and walked towards the car behind me. i told her that i've got no money so i can't pay for her and she either has to ask mom for money or use her own money. then the wind blew hard and lightning struck the ground as that unhappy, angry face came back to her and she ran back into the house, slamming the door along the way, and went to her room. i was left astonished. what did i do wrong this time? DO I REALLY HAVE TO PAY FOR EVERY SINGLE THING SHE WANTS? IS THAT THE PROBLEM? i walked back into the house and into her room and --- i should have expected --- noticed a huge pillow heading straight toward my head. thank goodness it was only a pillow, but i became more aware in case she's got anything sharp handy. i calmly asked her what was wrong and all i got was more pillow on my face as she burst into tears, screaming "GET OUT", "I HATE YOU", and "GET OUT OF MY ROOM" over and over again i could have sworn it was a recording. now, i should have put a lot of exclamation marks there inside the quotation to let you know that it was a scream, but i hate exclamation marks, they sound angry. so i decided to leave her alone and spent the rest of my night wondering what i did wrong.

one thing won't leave my head. DO I REALLY HAVE TO FUCKING PAY FOR EVERY FUCKING THING SHE FUCKING WANTS? hmm, you know how people say profanity helps you release the anger and frustration? well, i used three in boldface and they didn't help. so i guess profanity isn't that useful after all. but seriously, is it because i said i didn't want to pay for her? i'm sorry, i might be a typical guy and typical guys don't usually notice how sensitive girls are, but come on, look at this blog on your monitor and tell me that you would cry and yell "i hate you" at your brother because he refused to pay for your drink.

sometimes i wish i were a better brother. i've always dreamt of having a sister who always smiles and thinks i'm the best brother ever. i guess that's what i dreamt back in 1988 when i prayed every night for a sister. i remember back when i was 4 i asked my mom if i can have a sister and she told me to pray every night for it. so i did, and a year later my sister was born and in the hospital after delivering her, my mom smiled at me, rubbed the back of my head, and said to me, "god answered your prayer, huh." i nodded. that night i, barely five years old, made a vow to myself that i would take care of her and always make her happy, because she's the sister i had asked for and for her god has taken some time off his busy work to grant me my wish.

so i guess i should have said "let's go, i'll pay for your coffee."

but then again, it's all back in the past and i can't change it.

** sighs **

this is my game over. farewell, me.