the big one

the mind is a powerful thing which has a mind of its own. it is therefore not redundant to say that the mind has a mind of its own. it thinks for itself. it thinks continuously. it refuses to stop thinking, even for the slightest bit.

that is why if you have nothing to think about, the mind starts wandering somewhere, taking it with you, and usually the places it starts to wander to are places that are dark, hazardous, and consist of infinite amount of bottomless abyss, such that if you and your mind do not tread carefully, both of you will fall into the one of them and self-destruction may just well be imminent.

if you fall, it will take you years to climb back up. sometimes even never.

the question is not how to climb out of the abyss, but how to not let your mind wander. your mind is yours, and you should always have it under your control. like a newborn child, NEVER let your mind be outside your full control.

"if anyone can hear me, hear this. my mind is my center and everything that happens there is my responsibility. other people may believe what it pleases them to believe, but i will do nothing without i know the reason why and know it clearly. if you want something, then let me know, but do not you dare touch my mind." ~dirk gently

a wise man, mr. gently is.

so in order to stop that little prick from wandering about to dangerous places, i usually make it think of something to draw. the resulting is something like these:



since dan has been bugging me so much about a comic about PANDA RIDER, and



since i have never seen a fully naked woman body in my life, and am therefore unable to correctly draw the anatomy of a woman body. i would like to take one of those human body drawing classes, but they always have models that do nothing but hurt the eyes of the people trying to draw them. so i guess i will simply wait until i can get a good-looking young woman to model for me.

lookie, 4am. i should go sleep now.

fmgpmui

uh oh

i broke my favorite coffee cup today. i am not superstitious, but i think that was a sign of bad things that are imminent.

may i be given the strength to deal with them.

stnlp

home is where home is

back in sandiego now. good ol' sandiego, where i have spent at least eighty percent of the last three-and-a-half year of my life. new quarter starts next week, but lots of things need to be dealt with before then. new year, same old shit.

stereotyping is a bad thing, but when you're driving through orange county and every five miles down the road you see an asian dude wearing a sleeveless shirt and a cap tilted to the side driving a lowered honda civic trying to speed from the right lanes and end up stuck behind a massive truck going forty-five mph, you start to wonder if there is some truth to the stereotype. after all, there has got to be a reason as to how the stereotype first came to existence.

while driving down to san diego, i decided to play a game, since i thought playing a game was much more interesting than feeling horny for no reason. apparently the little guy thought that a good way to keep me awake was to stay awake himself. one thing he did not realize was that this led to utter confusion instead that ruined my concentration. hence why i decided to play this game.

the rule was simple: pick a car in front of you, and follow exactly what it does. if the car decides to exit where you don't want to, pick another car, and do the same thing. my eyes were caught on this silver PT cruiser driving at seventy mph on the left lane. i did not feel like following a crazy driver and putting my life at stake because of this stupid game, so i decided to follow this cruiser since it seemed to be driving passively.

note to self: just because a car had been driving passively for twenty miles straight, it didn't mean that it would keep doing so. it was either because of the driver had a sudden revelation that reckless driving was fun or that he realized that a maroon corolla had been following him for the last twenty miles, but this PT cruiser then started to speed up to what seemed to be ninety-five mph and switch lanes whenever an object popularly known as a car obstructed his path. my corolla would not go ninety-five without me having to get a new engine for it, so i decided to stay at eighty, but keeping my eyes on this cruiser. the cruiser took off and left me eating his dust.

fifty miles later, however, i was back on his tail. this was done without recklessly cutting people off and going over eighty. game's over, cruiser. i won.

bozbwln

sixty seven to nil

currently in glendora's public library, where wireless internet exists.

four days into the new year and nothing very exciting had happened. but i guess it couldn't be helped since i currently resided in glendora. going back to la jolla tomorrow, so hope things get exciting then.

i applied to nine different graduate schools already, and decided to stop it there. of these nine, only one of them is in the top-ten, while the rest spans from 11 to 40, so i should get in to at least one. let's hope that 2006 is a lucky year for me, and that fortune cookie that says "this winter heaven will rain success on you" is true.

so far it has been just rain, no success. damn cookie.

ayumi hamasaki's MY STORY CLASSICAL is a lovely album. her arena tour was superbly done, too. almost like a broadway musical, asian version. GARNET CROW's 19th single hare dokei is also magnificent. apparently i've gotten it wrong all this time: it is not yuKi nakamura, it's yuRi nakamura. no wonder everytime i google her name some irrelevant shit pops out.

ndaluwx

light, camera, action

rgwqflff